Out of Reach

This is one of the most painful ironies ever. What do you think?

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We sat beside one another

Yet we are so far away

The only thing that is near

Is my memory of being held

During those long forgotten nights

When all I thought about

Was the warmth of your touch

Not my pending paperworks

Not my overdue bills

I only thought of you

And I know that you were 

Thinking the same

But now, sitting here with you

I don't know if you are

Thinking about it too

You are looking 

Over the horizon

When you could have been

Looking at me

I wanted to touch you

To make sure that 

You are really there

But I stopped myself

I don't think I want to find out.

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*Image from digitaledge

Hide and Seek

When do you stop looking and start waiting to be discovered?

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I'm tired of looking

For that special someone.

The fabled creature

Of everyone's dreams.

The ever elusive 

Partner, or so it seems.

I have looked 

All around to no avail.

To my utter disbelief

and grave dissapointment

I have seen a lot

I have seen no one.

Comfort me then

Beloved self

For who else will 

Dry my forlorn tears

But the very hand it 

Lands on?

I'm going to wait

For that faceless being

To find me

When I'm not 

Even hiding

From anyone.

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 *Picture from my22.files.wordpress

Dead End

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What do you do when there's no other way but to start again with nothing?
*Friend, this is made for you.

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Tears gently fell off

The curve of your cheeks

Bringing with it

All your love for me,

Or the little that is left.

You spoke of words

I once told you,

Of promises I never kept,

And times I never showed up,

You spoke without a heart.

With your blank stares

And matching indifference

I realized that this is the end,

For me, Never for you.

I lost your love for me.

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*Picture from datingwithdignity

Of Candles & Cakes

Who do you wish for?

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I blew a wish

Towards the fire

And prayed that the wind

Carried it all,

Not just bits and pieces

Of my song,

But everything

My heart longs for.

I hoped that those

Who ate slices of the cake

Did not devour my wishes

Because if that's the case

Then my only desire

Will come running down

The dirty drain,

My future gone into the sewer.

I felt the wind

Blowing against me

And in that instant

I saw all the dreams

Carried by the wind,

The very wind that carried 

My birthday wishes,

I started praying.

I asked the heavens to not let 

The wind blow against you.

I don't want you to know

That my wishes are about you,

It's a secret between me and God

Just like how we kept things

between us.

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*Picture from asifa-sf.org

Love Gourmet

You think I can't read?

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We thawed.

Not like the glaciers floating 

In the midst of the Atlantic

But the kind of thawing

Required for a piece of meat:

Lacking artistry

And full of crass.

It satiates not heart's thirst

But the flesh's hunger.

I have never realized

That a haloed person 

Can be so cruel,

When I did nothing but

Give more air under

Your wings.

You fried me

With all the love I

Have given you,

So much so that it

Became a poison to all

The wounds I started to lick.

We could have made 

Scrumptious offerings to one another.

Sadly you chose everything

To be blandly half baked.

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*Picture from static.guim.co.uk

Street

The incessant noise unnerves me

for I am raised to enjoy peace.

I'm out of place amidst all the

squacking and purring of people

I don't know.

And I don't know a lot.

Honking cars disrupt the little peace

I have left.

Making me regret stepping 

out of the house.

Where all things bow to me.

Everything pleases my eyes

and my ears the way 

my stepping out of my house

did not.

I feel drowned by all the busy-ness

around me. 

I feel weak and nauseous. 

Then, I saw black

And I can't hear anything.

During that fleeting moment

I felt euphoria.

Age-Old Courting

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It started with a glance.

With a lot of it, for that matter.

Pulling me into a duel

Where I started out as an 

Unwilling participant.

It continued with more glances.

Still with lots of it.

Burning me with an 

Invisible fire only

The two of us can feel.

The glances stopped.

Things went a notch further.

But I didn't initiate it.

The countless glances were for that.

So, I waited like a hunter waits for his prey.

Now's the time to mention

The other dueler.

The one who clearly tries so hard

To mark the territory that 

Unfortunately, desires the hunter.

That's when the eye daggers

Started hitting me.

Cold, blunt and direct.

But what can a mere dog who marks his 

Territory do against a hunter who has mastered the craft?

Nothing.

Exactly.

The inevitable happened.

The prey went for the bait.

As expected.

Clueless and Ignorant.

The time has come to finish this off.

With a smile and more quick glances

I sealed the deal.

I didn't do it.

It was the prey who did it.

But we really know who did it, right?

The loser dog left

And stated licking his wounds.

I can't blame the dog.

It didn't know what it was up against.

Like the prey, the dog was clueless.

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*Picture from http://etc.usf.edu/clipart/6000/6021/fencing_6_lg.gif

Sleep

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Empty moonless nights

Beckon me towards sleeplessness

Urging me to stay awake.

To bathe in the unrivalved glory

Of its borrowed shine.

Making me a witness to

A different world in the dark

Where nightingales render soulful arias

And owls become sentries ofthe night.

Sometimes I wait for the

Sun to level in the horizon.

For morning birds to chirp on the day.

What I cannot do is to

Sleep still through the 

Quiet of the moonless night

With the fear of not waking up with you.

I fear that sleep will take you away.

I'm afraid love will be gone.

That's why I'd rather have dark circles

Under my eyes,

Than to create the same dark circles

Around our beating hearts.

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Picture from http://www.logoi.com/pastimages/img/sleeping_beauty_2.jpg

Existence

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Burned out shining stars

Became the only audience

To the shrilling aria I gave.

The moon unwillingly

took over the place of

My Symphony's Maestro.

I never knew that goodbyes

Can be beautiful songs.

Continuously reminding me

Of a certain time when

Life was everything but painful.

When Love was nothing but pure.

No matter where you go

Or whatever you may do,

I know that in the most mundane

Things that you'll do,

My memory will haunt you.

It will take you to me.

You are hiding behind the

Shadows of our pain.

Relinquishing in the tears I shed.

I won't be there. I won't be anywhere.

But time will come when you'll 

Start looking for me.

Look for me in the

Memories that we so

Happily shared-before.

Feel me with the things

We used to do.

Make the most of your 

Creative imagination.

It'll only be there that 

I'll exist for you.

I was erased the moment you left.

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*Picture from http://www.visitlbiregion.com/includes/media/images/Looking-to-sea-OC-Historical.jpg

BIG FAT LIAR

Based on a true story.

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You are my Love.

The very blood that runs through

My mortal body.

Giving me the chance 

To live, love and laugh.

I miss you sooo much.

You are the breath 

I always have to take to survive.

Without you I'll be lifeless.

I'll amount to nothing significant.

I love you.

I miss you.

I want to be with you.

That is until I discovered

You tell this beautiful things

To other people too.

Words I thought 

Were uttered only for me.

But were not.

For that, you are SHIT. 

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*Picture from http://thumbs.dreamstime.com/thumb_118/1170364205L7bKa9.jpg

I Tore It Into Pieces (Sequel to I Stole A Letter)

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My heart knows the letter's

Every period, coma and semi colon.

It's the written version of what people

Call the Last Song Syndrome.

It served as my lullaby during

Sleepless nights.

When the Sun goes up

Over the horizon it waits

For me to open my eyes.

But as much as I want to 

Stay with it, 

The longer I suffer

From emotional suicide.

So one night during my Taxi ride home,

I closed my almost tearful eyes and

Made my hands the body part version

Of a paper shredder.

Pieces of my useless addiction

Were left under the Taxi seat.

The timid driver unaware of

My duel with a love lost which

 Unfortunately will never be found.

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*Pictures from http://blogs.seattleweekly.com/dailyweekly/taxi.jpg and http://forums.unfiction.com/forums/viewtopic.php?mode=attach&id=7276&thumb=1

I Stole A Letter

 To all my friends you know what I'm talking about here. I finally got the chance to make something out of my Zahir like experience.

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I stole a letter.

It wasn't even addressed to me.

But it was about me.

Jumbled words caressing

My wounded heart of long ago.

Honest declarations of

Love connected the

Recalcitrant texts.

Indulging in the creation

Of goodbyes and hellos.

I read.

I felt.

I ached.

I wished.

I reminisced.

I longed.

I let go.

I stole a letter. 

It almost stole my heart too.

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*Picture from http://www.neurosoftware.ro/programming-blog/wp-content/plugins/wp-o-matic/cache/365ca_final7.jpg

Disappointment

Stormy thoughts dulled my senses.

Rendering me useless

like only Smirnoff could.

Once grand ideas now

seem they're fly infested trash.

I feel like hobo living

with my cousins-the vermins

and cockroaches- not to mention

the other scavengers prowling

the darkened alley.

Filth is the ever present fashion trend.

I saw my day crushed 

with the torrent winds

and angry waves of my emotion.

I felt its descent in a

downward spiral.

My day sunk at the bottom

of the sea,

where creatures not known

to man roam,

where darkness is the only friend.

I felt suffocated with 

the stillness in this abyss

that the Sun doesn't know.

I closed my eyes

and felt the underwater pressure

I created.

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*Picture from http://www.brandoncole.com/profile%20photos/MISCELLANEOUS/shipwrecks/pm0126-D-shipwreck_brandon_cole.jpg

Outside My Window

This is for you! You know who you are! 
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There are days when I just stop

what I'm doing and

stare out the window.

Searching for you along

that busy street.

Hoping that it'll be you

who'll walk up next.

With your bouncy stride

and your happy gait.

But I'm not

counting on it much.

Not as much as 

I want to- I guess.

Sometimes I feel joy

seeing a part of yourself

with other people who walk by.

Some have your hair,

your eyes, your favorite 

shirt- but not the totality of you.

I continue staring and dreaming.

I close my eyes 

and remember what's

about you that I fell in love with.

And not for long

they are all so real- you are so real!

Then, I decided to continue

what I'm doing before I stared

out the window- thinking of you.

After a while I know

I'll look for you again

among the faces of the people

who walk by outside my window. 

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*picture from https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiKA9-8sbwA7XcXxRUTiVv7wJ7j3_QpmmURl3EFXxQLxPj6Ge9M-4aDneIqJ9xK44NarUbOM316aqZcBm6PHzH-8jc4K_P7pwrtJ0p_6UTgrFnCRU_YhYtnkQulPrv5H5aaio9l94bd-kND/s1600/elderly-man-staring-out-window.gif